Life is like a country road with all the twists and turns that we experience. When you think you finally have reached a calm moment, a sudden event happens and turns your world upside down. Maybe you lose your job, experience a major traumatic event, have an unplanned pregnancy, are publicly humiliated, get a divorce, lose a loved one to death or become seriously ill. Those events can cause you to feel lost and act completely out of character because your world suddenly feels foreign.
YOU feel foreign!
So you get stuck.
Stuck like a fly in a spider’s web.
Stuck like a stalled car in the middle lane of a major highway during rush hour traffic.
Stuck like a smooshed bug on the windshield.
That stuck feeling is something we have all experienced and it isn’t something enjoyable.
Your past is not only over, but you can’t go back and change any of it. You have to let go of all the happiness, pain and regrets that are in the past.
The future is still unknown. You need to dream and imagine with hope and happiness, but recognize that you can’t be sure any of it will come to fruition.
Where does that leave you?
In the “now.” You are in the moment of “known present” that is occurring right after “the past” and right before the “unknown future.”
Are you stuck? Do you know how to get unstuck?
How To Get Unstuck And Get Out Of A Rut
When you are in the midst of a crisis, it is imperative that you recognize your current condition and state of mind. Only through that recognition can you begin to get unstuck and to get out of a rut.
How do you progress from being stuck so that you can once again live in happiness?
That’s really the billion dollar question!
There are several things that you can do to get unstuck.
- Pay Attention To Your Body: Stress can totally throw off your body clock. Rather than stress over the fact that you feel more tired, take naps whenever you have time available. Also, watch your sugar and caffeine intake to avoid adding more stress to your body. Instead choose healthy food and pamper your body with long baths or massages.
- Self-Acceptance: Remember your strengths and focus on them. Avoid listing all your negatives or the things that you haven’t accomplished. Buoy yourself up and with positives.
- Self-Talk: It is vital that your self-talk remains positive about your current condition and positive when thinking of the future. Post notes to yourself as reminders of inspiring and motivational thoughts. Read encouraging books that give you hope for happiness.
- Grieve and Accept: You can either become stuck in grief or you can grieve and then accept the circumstance. We all handle the grieving process differently. I believe that as long as you are trying to move forward through your grief in a healthy manner, eventually you will accept it and no one has the right to tell you how long or how to grieve. Your personality will also determine how you grieve and become unstuck from that grief. You do not have to grieve forever. You can be happy.
- Practice Gratitude: Being thankful and feeling sincere gratitude is an excellent tool in progressing through hard times. Keep a list of the things that bring you happiness and cause you to feel grateful. Refer to the list often. Not only will it encourage positiveness in your life, but it will keep your mind focused and moving forward.
- Avoid The Quick Fix: Quick fixes don’t fix. Often the quicker the fix, the worst the outcome. Work through becoming unstuck with a solid fix that will be permanent for your emotions and life circumstance. Avoid lies to others, but most importantly don’t lie to yourself. What is, is. You can change. You can conquer.
- Seek Help: No man is an island. Surround yourself with people who love you and seek the counsel of trained professionals to help you. Don’t try to launch the ship all alone. A reliable, caring crew always makes the job easier. Those who love you can make the journey easier if you allow them to help and your success will be a time of happiness and joy for all to celebrate.
- Have A Plan: If you don’t plan, life will carry you hither and tither like dust in the wind. Set down with a definite plan for success and then break it into baby steps. Just as Rome wasn’t built in a day, you won’t reach the destination in a day either. Becoming unstuck not only takes effort, it takes time and a plan. A plan will tell you how to progress through all the steps until you reach the unstuck state and once again feel happy.
“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” ~ Laozi ~
“For after all, the best thing one can do when it is raining is let it rain.” ~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow ~
“A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.” ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry ~
As you work through the unstuck journey, do it without anger. Go through the stages with a recognition that the past changed you and let it die peacefully so that you can move into the new future which holds a promise of happiness. This change you experience in the present is where many people get stuck in the rut of life. It is the moment between was, is and will…what was, what is and what will be.
This is life.
This is your life.
Experience it with the support from loved ones and be kind to yourself. Life is not a race. Don’t miss the happiness in the now even while you’re stuck. By taking the time to enjoy love and feel gratitude in the present, you will be surprised how much it will help you get unstuck and find happiness again. Embrace the present and let the changes bring about a metamorphosis of your body, mind, soul and life.