Negatives Can Be Beautiful – 8 Positive Negatives

by Sherry Riter in Attitude,Motivation,PTSD,Self-Development  

negative rock map and quote

It was a Monday.

I don’t like any Monday because it is the day after two days of freedom. Even though it was Monday, I decided to have a positive attitude and put forth the extra effort to counteract the Monday blues. All day in the back of my mind, I knew that at 6:00 p.m. I had a therapy appointment. I was looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time.

Since I had to leave directly from work to get to my appointment, I decided to take the straight shot instead of going all the way home and then backtracking. I am directionally challenged, so I was a bit apprehensive at trying the new route. Because it would shave thirty minutes off my trip and it was almost a straight shot, I had to do it. Besides, the day had gone pretty good.

I went over the bridge and knew that I was really close according to the map, but within minutes I was lost. That’s when I started to panic which caused me to get even more lost. Anger and frustration set in while I seemed to continue on the wrong road.

negative terror at being lost

I didn’t want to miss my appointment and was bordering on PTSD terror and hysteria when I called my sweet, calm daughter. For the next twenty-five minutes, Alyssa told me to turn left, turn right and eventually directed me to my therapist’s office.

I hoped that my therapist was still there. After waiting for twenty minutes without any sign of her, I concluded that I was definitely too late and my therapist had left the building.

Sitting calmly for so long in the foyer outside her office had a calming affect on me. It was pointless to remain upset. What had happened was over. I couldn’t do it over again. I also can’t help that I get lost so easily. Buying some kind of navigation device is definitely on my list of things to give myself. Not only will it help me get to where I’m going, but having a navigation system will eliminate mishaps like today.

With some self-talk that pointed out my long, long list of good traits (wink), I turned the car in the direction of home and pushed the pedal to the metal. I didn’t really speed, but it sure felt good imagining that soaring sensation for just a second as I wrote those words!

negative peaceful blue happy pink

8 Reasons Negatives Are Good

Negative experiences and emotions can actually have a positive impact on your life. It does, however, require the “glass half full” attitude in order to process the information in a beneficial manner.

Sounds good, doesn’t it? Listen. If I was able to see my negative experience on Monday in a positive light, then anyone can do it.

Here are 8 positives of going through negative experiences:

  1. Motivates - If we separate ourselves from all the emotions bubbling inside and subjectively analyze a negative experience, it can motivate us toward improvement. We will become careful not to repeat whatever actions brought us the negative.
  2. Strengthens - How does that saying go? “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.” Oh yeah. That’s the saying. The negatives and challenges can strengthen our resolve to succeed and thrive in the face of adversity.
  3. More Opportunities - Without opposition, our learning would be stunted and it would limit our happiness. Knowledge brings about greater opportunities for failure and achievement. Learning brought about by the negative experiences helps to improve our future choices.
  4. Know Yourself – Being at the bottom allows you to see yourself stripped down to the real you – the private you. It is the you that can’t be escaped. Negative experiences help to hone your positive self and redefine your self-perception.
  5. Smarter - “I’ll never do THAT again!” We’ve all said that phrase after going through a negative experience. Why? Well, because we learned something positive from the negative experience and in so doing, we have become smarter.
  6. New Perspective – “Walk a mile in his shoes,” is a saying I have incorporated in my life. It keeps me humble and non-judgmental of other people. I don’t know what that person has gone through or is going through, so I have no right to judge them. After going through a negative experience, you can see things with a new perspective.
  7. Humility - Negative experiences can teach you to be humble if you shun bitterness. It is EASY to be bitter, but the rewards of humility are boundless.
  8. Appreciate More – “You don’t know what you’ve got until it is taken away.” Isn’t that the truth?! After suffering through the pain of a negative experience, it is much easier to appreciate the simpler things in life thanks to a new perspective.
    1. negative eyes window of the soul

      I learned a lot during the challenging drive today. Top on the list is that no matter how long it takes, I’m going to win the battle against PTSD. Not only am I going to win, I will thrive with the new me that emerges from the rubble.

      Life is filled with experiences and we learn just like we did in school. When we excel and pass one subject, it is time to move to the next one. The speed at which we pass the “class” is irrelevant. As long as we keep learning, our opportunities for growth will continue to expand, providing more happiness than we have ever dreamed.

      Schools out until tomorrow, so let’s go to recess! Anyone want a cream puff? LOL

       

       

      This post was written by...

      Sherry Riter is also known as The Redhead Riter. Sherry is witty, intelligent and addictive as she writes about cooking, family, marriage, failures, blogging tips, art, humor, inspiration, travel, PTSD and aging. Her goal is to inspire, motivate, educate and to make her audience laugh. Sherry embraces being a redhead and helps others to see the redhead point of view…"In some eras redheads were worshipped while others thought us witches. Personally, I like the former and think every day is 'Love a redhead day!'" She can also be found on Facebook, Google+, Pinterest, StumbleUpon, Linkedin, tweeting as @TheRedheadRiter and you can subscribe to her free blog feed.

{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

1 lisa simmons August 21, 2012 at 4:06 am

You did it again, Lifting my spirits, you have a way in doing that you know, and for that I thank you…. I will take what I have read today and apply to my daily job. Think I will share the 8 reasons the negatives are good with my co-workers. For our most negative day of the WK (thursday). Perhaps this might give us a little inspiration. Processing payroll with Deadlines, with always an anticipation of our friend (Murphy) as in Murphy’s law visiting, this might help us. Thank you so much for your post. Wishing you a wonderful tuesday….:)

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2 The Redhead Riter August 21, 2012 at 11:57 am

I’m so glad that I could lift your spirits today. I hope everyone at work enjoys it too. :D I hope you have a lovely day. {{{hugssss}}}

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3 mom August 21, 2012 at 4:29 am

Hello, Welcome to my world, won’t you come on in,lol Elvis sang this song. It is one of my favorites!!! Learn to laugh at yourself. You said you were not like me, ha, in some things you are,lol, lol. Just remember this–look at yourself in the mirror. The brain cannot handle a negative and a positive at the same time!! So when you are down, go talk to yourself . This is what I say, “Good morning, Teresa. This is going to be a good day. You are young , fairly healthy, have wonder girls and you are the most.” lol–funny No—But my negative thoughts have no room with all the positive ones. It took me months to learn to do this, but it works. One day I felt so worn out and down on myself. I went in front of my mirror and I said, “You are not old. You are full of youth and have aged nicely. You are NOT old and you are not tired!” When I left the bath, I looked 40. I was smiling and I was not tired!! It works, but it takes work to accomplish. You must be sincere to your image and love yourself. We are Children of God and followers of Jesus Christ. That is what looks back at you in the mirror. As Scarlet said, “Tomorrow is another day.” { my favorite quote} Love you Sherry—

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4 The Redhead Riter August 21, 2012 at 11:59 am

Okay, I’m looking in the mirror…

“I am 25 years old. I sing like Carrie Underwood, Barbra Streisand and Shakira. I have a body like a playboy bunny. I’m as rich as Bill Gates. I have no freckles.”

Hmmm…

Mom, how long does it take to happen?

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5 Susanne August 21, 2012 at 7:43 am

Good Morning,

First I’d like to say, very funky photos. I don’t know, I think you are my kindred spirit, the positive one. I too am directionally challenged. I can get lost in a paper bag. An old saying that one of my mothers taught me. Yes, I have two mothers. Children of divorce often have multiple parents. Anyway, I have only lived in this area for less than two years. The first 1 1/4 years were spent on a subway heading into Boston and back and the grocery store. I have no clue as to how to get around. The GPS has been a life saver. It reduced my anxiety on the road exponentially, even when I lived in familiar territory. Although the GPS has a mind of its own and she leads me on trips that I should pack a picnic lunch for, sometimes I just let Ruthie, yes I’ve named her, take the reins .I know that she will get me where I need to go, even if it takes an hour longer. That’s the sense of comfort that works for me.

There is a long tunnel that goes through Boston that cuts 20 minutes off of the time it takes to visit my family. Itt has been my “big monster”, until two weeks ago. Finally, I forced myself to take the tunnel route. Throughout, I was anxious and less than comfortable, hands gripping the wheel, but I did it. The following weekend I did it again, without white knuckles. Will I do it again? Probably not, for several reasons. The traffic going through Boston is miserable. I do not want to get stuck in a traffic jam in the tunnel and the view is really prettier taking the longer route. However, I can say to myself…YOU FACED YOUR MONSTER!

These are my baby steps, because I have several other monsters to face, all larger than the tunnel. I’ve been stripped down to the real me for quite some time and I’m fine with that. I am now more true to myself. I’m not attempting to impress anyone any longer. I may even be a better person now. Bottom line: I have to agree that the negatives in life are some of the best learning experiences and resources that we can draw from.

I’m not sure how, but we’ll be OK. Again, with your positive attitude you are going to be more than OK. You are going be just ducky! That means all good…lol. Hugs!

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6 The Redhead Riter August 21, 2012 at 12:00 pm

I love the pictures!!!! Oh, can I say that about my own stuff? LOL

Yes, I’m sure we are related. Mom swears she only had two children though, so maybe we are cousins. ;)

I was stuck one time in the tunnel. I thought I would have a heart attack before I got out of there. UGH!!!!!!

Ducky? Okay. I’m going to believe you. I sure hope you’re right! {{{hugssssssss}}}

Hope your day was mahhhhhhvelous daaaaahhhhhling. :D

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7 Skip_D August 22, 2012 at 4:14 am

Yes, they are fantastic pictures, & yes, by all means you can say so! ;)

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8 The Redhead Riter August 22, 2012 at 7:27 am
9 cindi August 21, 2012 at 9:41 pm

I too suffer from PTSD and sometimes the smallest of things can set me off. Thanks for your inspirational story. Reading experiences from another PTSD sufferer is really a blessing. Like you, I take each day as it comes and try very hard to see the positives rather than focusing on the negatives like I used to. Thanks for sharing

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10 The Redhead Riter August 22, 2012 at 7:24 am

Thank you, Cindi. It helps me too to read about other PTSD sufferers because it helps me know that I’m not alone. {{{hugssss}}}

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11 Rescuing Little L August 22, 2012 at 12:06 am

Really enjoyed this post and seemed to identify with your challenges with directions….also the added panic PTSD reaction. Gosh, I have been there many times and work with it continually. I guess I thought I must be the only one…..So glad that you could calm yourself and you are right, what else could you do? And the photos were stunning….I had to go back and look at them again!

Laurel :-)

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12 The Redhead Riter August 22, 2012 at 7:26 am

Thank you! I’m so glad you enjoyed the post!

You are not the only one, so never feel alone. {{{{hugsss}}}}

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13 Skip_D August 22, 2012 at 4:12 am

Yes! I want a cream puff!!! :D You certainly earned one after finding those positives from such a negative! Great list!

Now, about that GPS… ;)

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14 The Redhead Riter August 22, 2012 at 7:27 am

Yes, I need to know which GPS is the best to buy. I want one that talks so I don’t have to look at it constantly. Any suggestions?

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15 Skip_D August 22, 2012 at 9:27 am

I’m not an authority on GPS units. I don’t know if it’s because I grew up sailing, or if it’s my Viking heritage, but I never get lost… sometimes I don’t know where I am, but I always find where I’m going. I use what sailors call “dead reckoning” to navigate from point A to point B. I bet your Magnificent Seven can advise you.

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16 The Redhead Riter August 22, 2012 at 8:36 pm

I’m so jealous of your ability to navigate without a GPS. TOTALLY jealous!

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17 Susanne August 22, 2012 at 2:11 pm

I love my Garmin Nuvi 205. It’s one of the more basic models, but it does exactly what we need it to do. Price is more basic as well.

One of the big box stores will carry it, or even Walmart, BJs, Costco or Target. I’m not sure what’s in your area. Jump on the Garmin site and see you might like to have as a companion.

Bye for now…cuz..lol.

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18 The Redhead Riter August 22, 2012 at 8:37 pm

Thank you Susanne! I will check them out.

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19 Joan August 24, 2012 at 7:26 pm

Redhead Riter, you might be “directionally challenged” but you are not artistically challenged. You are an artist in every sense of the word. Your photography is beautiful and your writing is superb! :)

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20 The Redhead Riter August 25, 2012 at 11:09 pm

Thank you so much. That really means a lot to me coming from you, Joan, because I know you are an excellent and accomplished writer.

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