I have earned the “Been There, Done That Diploma” and proudly display it on my living room wall in a huge gold frame with a light shining on it. I’m not perfect in a marriage or any other kind of relationship, but I do know many things that will enhance the bond.
I think all too often people approach marriage relationships unrealistically. They think that it will be white lace and roses every day. Actually, that is part of the problem – they don’t think past the day of white lace and roses.
Love is a beautiful emotion. If more people practiced unconditional, selfless love, this planet would be entirely different. The best place to start improving our lives and the lives of those around us is to learn how to have successful relationships.
must respect the thorn.”
Qualities and characteristics of a loving bond are easy to pinpoint because the relationship is happy, healthy and successful. I purposely did not put this list of attributes in order of importance because I wanted to keep disagreements down to a minimum (smile). Instead, they are listed by “length” of the word or phrase with the shortest being first. Nerdy way to do it, but I’m sure my listing method won’t surprise you at all. So here are 34 important things in a loving marriage or relationship:
- common goals
- sense of humor
- listens attentively
- agree to disagree
- common interests
- unconditional love
- emotional support
- not overly sensitive
- accepts without judgment
- willingness to communicate
- security/money/willing to work
- understands alone time/space
- expresses wants, needs and feelings
- keeps the relationship fresh/surprises
- time is set aside to do things together
- willing to negotiate and compromise/”win-win” attitude
- understands and accepts that there are definite differences in each person and that everything doesn’t always make sense
I know that is a long list, but you don’t have to be perfect to have a successful marriage or relationship. The “willingness” to work on it daily is the key. There never has been nor ever will be a union between two people that is perfect, but there are loving relationships that have many perfect moments.
Ahhh….perfect moments. That is why there are fairy tales. We long for the perfect moments in life. Well, they are possible, but there is hard work involved and a willingness to take the risk. In the end though, the perfect moments make it all worth it.
Love is like a rose: Long after the outer petals shrivel and fade, the most fragrant and intoxicating velvety softness can still be found.
That post was so serious!
I will leave you now with a rose and a bit of levity by the First Lady of the United States (1933 to 1945)…
I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read the description
in the catalogue:
no good in a bed,
but fine up against a wall.”
Happy Valentine’s Day! May you always love and be loved.