Little Girl’s Prayer For Grandpa
“Dear God,” the little girl said while kneeling by her bed. “Please send clothes for all those poor ladies on Grandpa’s computer. Amen.”
God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world, then he made the Earth round and laughed and laughed and laughed.
Lady’s Yearly Exam
I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse started with the basics.
“How much do you weigh?” she asked.
“135,” I said.
The nurse asked me to step onto the scale.
It turns out my weight is 180 pounds.
The nurse asked, “Your height?”
“5 foot 4,” I said.
The nurse checked and saw that I only measured 5 foot 2 inches.
She then took my blood pressure and told me that it was very high.
“Of course it is high!” I screamed. “When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I’m short and fat!”
The doctor put me on Prozac.
What a witch.