The Redhead Riter - Witty, Intelligent & Addictive: 7/1/11

Enduring Passionate Love

Simply put, romantic love is a feeling of intense desire and deep, tender passion for another person.

I heard what you said.
I’m not the silly romantic you think.
I don’t want the heavens or the
shooting stars.
I don’t want gemstones or gold.
I have those things already.
I want…a steady hand.
A kind soul.
I want to fall asleep, and wake,
knowing my heart is safe.
I want to love, and be loved.~Shana Abé~

Captain Corelli's Mandolin is a novel by Louis de Bernières as well as a 2001 film starring Nicolas Cage and Penélope Cruz. From the film is a definition of romantic love...

"When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are to become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No... don't blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away."

Yes, love is discussed daily, read about in books, watched in movies and listened to in music...

You'd think that people would have had enough of silly love songs.
But I look around me and I see it isn't so.
Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs.
And what's wrong with that?
I'd like to know, cause here I go again
I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you,
I can't explain the feelings plain to me, say can't you see?
Ah, she gave me more, she gave it all to me
Now can't you see,
What's wrong with that
I need to know, cause here I go again
I love you, I love you

Love doesn't come in a minute,
Sometimes it doesn't come at all
I only know that when I'm in it
It isn't silly, no, it isn't silly, love isn't silly at all.

How can I tell you about my loved one?
How can I tell you about my loved one?

How can I tell you about my loved one?
(I love you)
How can I tell you about my loved one?
(I love you)
I love you, I love you
I love you, I love you
I love you, I love you
I love you, I love you
You'd think that people would have had enough of silly love songs.
But I look around me and I see it isn't so.
Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs.
And what's wrong with that?

And what's wrong with that?

No Bake Banana Split Cake With Cream Cheese - No Eggs

Mom gave me a recipe a long time ago called "Banana Split Cake" and it is totally delicious. There is only one drawback to the recipe - there are three raw eggs in it and I do not eat raw eggs any more. That meant a little tweaking was required in order to enjoy the Banana Split Cake again and this is one version that uses cream cheese and no eggs. Alyssa was not very happy since she does not like cream cheese, so if you are like her, I have another version of this recipe that I will show you in the not too distant future. Until then, here is a very easy, quick and delicious recipe for my No Bake Banana Split Cake With Cream Cheese and No Eggs.

No Bake Banana Split Cake With Cream Cheese - No Eggs

Smoosh the Vanilla Wafer Cookies into crumbs.
Maybe "smoosh" is not the word I should use,
but I like that word.

Melt the butter

and pour it into the cookie crumbs that you smooshed.

Mix the butter and crumbs
and then flatten them in the pan
creating the bottom crust.

In another bowl add the sugar,

softened cream cheese,

and vanilla.

Beat until fluffy.

Fold the whipped cream into the cream cheese mixture.

Fold from the side, to the bottom,

and with a twist back over to the top.
Do not stir! Just fold the mixture.

Reserve 2 cups of this mixture,
but spread the rest on top of the cookie crumbs.

Sprinkle the drained pineapple over the mixture
creating the next layer.

Slice the ripe bananas.
Even if you do not eat bananas that have polka dots
of brown, these bananas are the sweetest.
Use the sweet banana in this recipe.
It just tastes better.

Slice the bananas and lay them on top of the pineapple.
Pat them down with your hand to create a firm layer.

Spread the remaining cream cheese mixture on top of the bananas.
Yes, you do see pieces of pineapple mixed into this layer.
It was an accident.
Do not ask me how it happened.
No, I am not telling you.

Sprinkle with chopped nuts.

Neatly arrange the maraschino cherries on top
and nestled amongst the nuts.

Refrigerate for 6 hours,
Delicious.
I would show you how a bite would look,
but my camera apparently has a full memory
and will not let me take another picture.
Since I did not think I would take 9,999 pictures so quickly,
I have not read how to delete them.
Sooooo, no room for a picture of me eating the Banana Split Cake.
How can I tempt you to the edge of sanity?!!!
I may just take a picture after I figure out my camera
and add it to this post later.
(smile)

No Bake Banana Split Cake with Cream Cheese- No Eggs

Ingredients:

2 cups Vanilla Wafer cookie crumbs
1/4 cup (1 stick butter), melted
8 ounces cream cheese, softened
1 cup confectioners' sugar (powdered sugar)
1 teaspoon vanilla
12 ounces Cool Whip whipped topping
1 can crushed pineapple, drained well
4 bananas, ripened and sliced
1 cup chopped pecans
1 jar maraschino cherries

Directions:

Mix cookie crumbs and melted butter. Spread and pack down on the bottom of a 9x13 inch pan.

In a separate bowl, whip the cream cheese, sugar and vanilla together. Fold in Cool Whip. Reserve 2 cups of this mixture and set aside.

Spread the remaining mixture over top of cookie crumbs. Sprinkle the pineapple over the mixture. Spread sliced bananas over the pineapple layer. Cover the bananas with the 2 cups of reserved cream cheese mixture. Sprinkle with nuts. Arrange cherries 2 inches apart on top.

Chill for 6 hours. Keep refrigerated until served.

Good luck eating just a small piece and not going back for seconds.

Stair Rail In Hell

If I were the railing on a flight of stairs, considering my age, I may look a little faded in color with a few spots of missing and peeling paint. Although life as an aging stair rail is not easy, I felt useful, needed, wanted and even desirable because of the steadfast way I performed my duty.

Then one day a traumatic event occurs - a tornado threatens to demolish the building that I perform my function in every day and night. At times, I feel that I will be torn to shreds as the roar of the winds and the pelting rain continue for what feels like an eternity. I begin to think that maybe I am living the life of a stair rail in Hell and that there is no escape from the constant torment.

Eventually, the tornado is over and although my building is still intact, I have been totally traumatized.

Up becomes down.

Left becomes right.

The stair rail repairman tells the building's owners that I have PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. In time and with therapy, I will heal. The repairman does not guarantee that I will be 100% what I was before, but I should improve. In the meantime, I should be able to perform my duties, but there will be days that I simply should not be asked to support anyone as they climb the steps of the stairs.

I am very sad hearing this prognosis, however, I have become so traumatized, nothing really lingers long in my memory. All I can think about is the tornado with the violent winds that threatened to destroy my owners, the building and me.

Many of the owners of the building and their friends climb the stairs and are aggravated because I no longer look the same nor do I perform or act the same. They ignore the advice of the repairman and expect me to immediately be the old stair rail again.

I cannot.

I want to be like I used to be, but I literally cannot.

Hours turn into days and days into months while I continue struggling to stand straight. Eventually, the constant reoccurring playback of the dreaded tornado night ends. I am so relieved! I do not see a tornado nor hear the rushing winds every waking moment. Three or four times a day the memory will pop into my mind, but for the most part, I feel a great sense of relief.

However...

I also feel exhausted and weak.

I almost cannot remain straight.

As a matter of fact, I feel like collapsing.

My bolts are still tight. The paint is still holding tightly to the metal. I am a bit faded in color, but still intact.

Why, oh why can't I feel and be the way I used to when I stood happily on the stairs and supported everyone's climb each day?

After fourteen months, not that I am counting, I get a little of my color back, but my life is drastically different. I go through the motions of standing on the stairs now, but often do not find joy or happiness in helping others with their safe climb. At any given moment, part of me is lost within my own thoughts and far away from this life of standing straight on the stairs. I dream of being new and shiny again when loving hands kept my paint from peeling and particles of dirt were removed. Moments of happiness on the stairs take over my mind for many hours without my invitation to do so.

I want the repairman to come back, disassemble my bars and take me completely apart so that I am no longer a stair rail. Dreams of being a sailboat with a beautiful cloth sail feels more enjoyable than my current state. Unbidden, my mind keeps me in this train of thought even longer than thoughts of remaining a stair rail. When I do see life on the stairs for how it truly appears, I am baffled at why I cannot just pop back into being a happy and straight stair rail.

No one that climbs the stairs understands the torment I suffer because they are absorbed in their own journey up and down each step. When needed, many reach out to use me for support and then without a thought, continue on with their tasks.

If I were the railing of a flight of stairs that had been traumatized by a horrible turn of events, I would say that I struggle to stand straight. Each day brings many hours that are made easier by kind people who stop on the steps and make me laugh, give me hugs or throw me kisses. Some even recognize that I am not quite myself so they bring me lunch and big pieces of cake, write me nice emails, send me pretty pictures of far away peaceful places, have fake snowball fights in the middle of summer, drive me home from work, ask my advice about blogging because they see my value or talk to me for hours on the phone while cooking spaghetti every night for dinner. These people who stop on the steps beside me will never know how much I appreciate their time and effort because this stair rail is far more grateful than words can express.

As lame as it sounds, thank you from the bottom of my peeling painted heart for helping me stay straight on the stairs.

Reflections...

The sun will rise each morning without your permission.

People are wrapped up in their own lives and you may be just a fleeting thought that disappears as quickly as it appeared.

You may search all day for a sign of hope that things will some day be normal again, but you may not find it.

No one stays the same.

Wisdom happens while you're living through trial and error.

Hard work, dedication and loyalty does not always mean you will come out ahead.

There is a strong possibility that even though you treat people with compassion, respect and have been attentive to their needs in the past, they will not reciprocate when you are at your lowest.

More than likely, some day, something or someone will knock you down.

It may feel impossible to stand up again once you have been tossed to the bottom.

Life offers an opportunity for living, not an experience in fairness.

When you become the shadow of yourself, it is hard to find your color again.

It is easier to give up.

The sun will set each evening without your permission.

Dog Bone Fake

Alyssa's puppy, Bella, will eat and chew on just about anything. This has caused all kinds of lifestyle changes to ensure that she does not eat things that can potentially kill her. We have already had that close call and I do not really want to go through it again.

Bella has to have toys that she can chew to satisfy the gnawing urge as well as to keep her teeth cleaned. The perfect solution is something called a Nylabone. A Nylabone is in the shape of a bone, has the flavor of a bone and does the same job for Bella as a bone would provide. It is "Made from inert soft thermoplastic polymer, designed to satisfy the chewing instinct of moderate chewers."

Bella chews on the Nylabone all the time and still has not even put a dent in it. Obviously, Bella has met her match.

A Nylabone is a fake bone.

Fake dog bones serve a wonderful purpose and I am so glad that they were invented because otherwise I probably would not still have an attractive leather sofa, painted walls, carpeting, bedspread...you get the picture.

Friends should not be fake like a Nylabone.

When we have a friend, one of the main characteristics we seek in the friendship is honesty in character. People on the internet can hide behind a website or avatar and choose to project a totally false persona. The same thing can be done face-to-face in real every day life.

Building trust in a friendship is a hard hurdle to leap and the only way to do so is through time and experiences. Things you might do with friends include, but are not limited to:

Ski
Fish
Cook
Golf
Shop
Swim
Craft
Paint
Tie a quilt
Repair a car
Write a book
Go to a concert
Attend a seminar
Attend a sporting event
Work for a charitable cause
Take pictures of each other
Watch a movie at the theater
Take a trip to another state or country
Share a meal at a restaurant or at someone's home

During those shared experiences, you get to know your friends on a very personal level. You learn who they are, what they like and how they tick. Knowing these things about each other allows the friendship to grow.

Being fake totally thwarts the entire purpose of having a friend.

Friendships add value to life and make it more enjoyable. An insincere and fake friend is alike a Nylabone. They look like a friend, they act like a friend and they do the things friends do, but if they are faking their feelings, they are not a friend.

"When we were children, we used to think
that when we were grown-up we
would no longer be vulnerable.
But to grow up is to accept vulnerability...
To be alive is to be vulnerable."

~Madeleine L'Engle~

Friends that are Nylabones in disguise eventually either disappear from your life or cause you unhappiness and heartache.

There is no totally accurate way to ensure that the person is going to be your lifelong friend. People change. Life happens. The best that you can do is to evaluate the person's other friendships and past relationships.

More importantly, be the friend you want to have and be willing to put yourself into the relationship.

Friendships require a certain amount of vulnerability, so be willing to open up. Share yourself and share your life. There is no shortcut to growing a relationship and it definitely won't happen without a willingness to expose your inner self.

Being vulnerable is not easy for anyone, however, having an open heart will allow you to gain the greatest rewards - true love and friendship.

"Out of your vulnerabilities
will come your strength."~Sigmund Freud~

Now, the time we have all been waiting for...(drum roll) This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.

Below are a few discussions going on in my community :

Twitter Handles

Are you an organizing freak?

How old were you when you got your driver's license?

Alphabet game!!! Let's play

How political are you?

Temp where you live?

Food you could eat every day?

What is your business link and what do you sell?

How do you jump start your day?

What Can I Say? I'm A Post Counter Diva! (29,186 comments and counting!)

With a big, heartfelt thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation.

I am so glad that I've been able to become friends with these wonderful people who are so active in my community. I encourage you to add their blogs to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with us in my community.

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below (Yeah, we do crazy poses like that too because we are so stylish) and thank you for your participation!!

Joan at A Bad Marriage Is Fattening

Aleta at Aleta's Arty Facts

Shawnnita at My Inner Alfalfa

Kris at In The Kitchen With Audrey

Bev at eBlebco.com

Paula at This American Life

Pam doesn't have a blog, but you can find her in the community

Marlene at Marlene's Many Hats

Meg doesn't have a blog, but you can find her in the community

Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.

Woo Us To Your Blog

Woo Us To Your Blog

As always, attached is the weekly Linky to enter either the main URL to your site or add each post you publish throughout the week. You don't have to do anything special, just drop your link in and get a little extra exposure to your site.

Twitter Share And Suggest Button Or Icon For Two Accounts

Writing a blog is great, but if you want people to read it, you have to learn how to market the blog in creative ways. Twitter can potentially help increase blog readership and traffic. It is a wonderful medium for communication and networking in minimal words. It teaches you to get the most power in a message in the fewest words. I think married couples should Twitter. It would probably eliminate the "Yes, Dear" that is so often heard in a mimicking whisper during conversations of chore division. Imagine it men, women would only be able to talk about that shopping trip for a new pair of shoes in 140 characters or less!

I totally digressed. (rolling eyes - something I seem to be doing a lot of lately)

If you have a Twitter button or icon on your blog, then you are off to a great start. Did you see my beautiful Twitter button? When you click that Twitter icon, another window pops up and takes you to Twitter. Not just any Twitter page, but The Redhead Riter's Twitter page. It takes you there so that you can follow The Redhead Riter on Twitter! Yes, this is George Orwell's Big Brother from 1984 talking to you. If my mother actually makes it this far into this blogging tips post, she will have no idea what I am talking about...1984 was a book I read in high school and very radical back in the day!

Clicking a link and having it take the blog reader directly to the blog writer's Twitter account is convenient and easy. When the reader follows the "riter" (pun intended), it forms a bond of community, camaraderie and friendship. It is really great when someone wants to promote a post on your blog too. That is possible if you have a Tweet button or icon which is different than a Twitter button or icon. There's Twitter and Tweet buttons and icons, so don't get confused. The scenario for all this clicking would go something like this:

A person reads your blog.
They want to stay in touch, so they click the TWITTER button or icon and follow you on Twitter.
The person goes back to your blog.
After reading a post, they want to share it with their friends on Twitter.
They click the TWEET button or icon.
The message about your blog post is broadcast to all their friends on Twitter.
Their friends read the tweet and some of them go read your blog.
Some of those people come back again and again to read your blog.
Then one day they decide that they want to stay in touch with you, so they click the Twitter button and...yeah, the whole thing starts over again.

Traffic. Readers. Friends. Marketing.

There is yet another feature of a Twitter Share button or icon that can be implemented on a blog. After a reader tweets your post, you can have the button programmed to encourage and suggest your reader to follow another Twitter account. Maybe you actually have two Twitter accounts or a friend you want to promote. If so, it is a handy feature.

How To Implement A Twitter Share And Suggest Button Or Icon

It all starts with the Tweet button or icon.

After clicking the Tweet button, a box pops up with a pre-populated message promoting the blog or post. You can add any comment you want to the box to make it more enticing for your readers to do what you are asking them to do. Basically you are saying, "Hello! I just read this great post and I want you to click the link. It will take you to the blog and then you too can Twitter follow this wonderful person."

After you launch the tweet, it appears on Twitter.

Did I convince you that it is wise to implement a button on your account? No? You don't think Twitter has that much to offer to you or your blog?

How about this fact: "Halfway through 2011, users on Twitter are now sending 200 million Tweets per day. For context on the speed of Twitter’s growth, in January of 2009, users sent two million Tweets a day, and one year ago they posted 65 million a day. For perspective, every day, the world writes the equivalent of a 10 million-page book in Tweets."

Maybe you understand the impact that Twitter can have especially in light of that very powerful information about the number of people and tweets on Twitter.

Well, here is how you are going to have Twitter market your blog. Make a Tweet button by going to Tweet button or icon Choose the button style by clicking the radio button (That's the little black dot in the middle of the circle).

Decide who you want "recommended" or "suggested" as someone to follow on Twitter. Enter their Twitter name and a blurb about who they are or what service they offer.

Then, grab the HTML code. Grab means "copy" so you can "paste" it.

Place the code in your HTML template where you want the button to appear. For example, if you want it to be at the end of your Blogger post, look for some HTML that includes "post" and "body" and put the code after it.

When someone clicks the TWEET button, they will get a suggestion to follow the person you chose. In my example it would be @TJSewsBeautiful

That is all it takes to marry Twitter with your blog! So, what are you waiting for?

Oh! By the way, if you haven't already followed me on Twitter, please jump over and click that beautiful little Twitter follow button for The Redhead Riter!

Chuckle of the Day - Devoted Husbands

I dare say that this is not really what most women have in mind when they think of "happy marriage" or "devoted husband," but it does make you wonder. Humor is usually based on reality, so I am guessing that the scenario pictured below has happened to someone!

(rolling eyes)

Organic White Peaches - Juicy, Fair Flesh

Saying that is was hot and humid today just is not an accurate description. As the sun beat down on the parched earth and moisture hung in the air like a Japanese sauna, the blistering temperatures caused the mercury to rise with a promise of triple digits through the weekend.

The thirty minutes of clammy heat was enough to cause an immediate strip down upon walking through the front door of my air conditioned home. Feeling sticky and roasted like a marshmallow at a Girl Scout camp out, I went straight to the kitchen for some liquid refreshment.

That is when I saw the delicious Sweet Muffins from yesterday. Although I have a basket full of ripe strawberries in the refrigerator and knowing that they would make a delicious strawberry shortcake dessert, the fruit that enticed me most were the organic white peaches.

Organic is a better choice simply because it is more natural, but white peaches deliver a very sophisticated and elegant flavor compared to it's sister, the yellow peach. White peaches have an overall acid content that is lower than yellow varieties and some hardly have any acid at all. This lack of acid causes the fruit to taste sweeter.

White peaches are whitish with the deep pink around the pit in the center instead of the orangish-yellow color found on traditional varieties. Sometimes there are streaks of florescent pink accenting the fair skin of the fruit. The outside of the peach is also much lighter in color than the regular peaches and has an almost light pink undertone to the skin.

Obviously, a ripened white peach is a delicacy and greatly desired by this burning hot redhead who spent too long in the sweltering sunshine on her way home from work. To help cool me off, I gathered a couple of chilled white peaches and washed them under the cold water running from the tap.

Holding the cold fruit and slowly cutting through the pinkish flesh helped to relax, as well as, cool me off a little bit. The juice dripped through my fingers like rain on flower petals.

The memory of the scorching sun and muggy curtain of air slowly began to slip away as I concentrated on creating a luscious refreshment.

Breaking the Sweet Muffin into quarters, I nestled the crumbly pieces in the center of the softly ripened, intensely flavored, slices of the white peaches. To add to the already delectable dessert, I added fresh whipped cream and drizzled honey all over the already sticky and juicy peach slices, Sweet Muffin and fluffy, white whipped cream.

The sugary peach juice dripping on the white flesh of the peach was almost too beautiful to eat...

but my mouth was salivating and the bowl of deliciousness was beckoning me to take a bite.

I opened the blinds on the large window, curled up against the cold leather of the couch and dipped my spoon into the bowl of promised goodness.

With the perfect proportions of peach, muffin, honey and whipped cream balanced on the spoon, I looked out the window at the blazing sunshine and put the bite in my mouth letting my eyelids flutter closed. The flavors were married on my tongue as I chewed one bite at a time enjoying the coldness of the peach flesh.

Slowly my skin was cooling off and I forgave the jungle moisture and desert heat outside for engulfing me earlier. With each bite from the bowl, I closed my eyes so that I could totally concentrate on the juicy, fair flesh mixing with the contrasting flavors of honey, cream and cake-like muffin.