Saturday Stalker - Great Fun 4 Kids

The Saturday Stalker found a blog that will help you look at life in a different way. Remember, you can stalk it the entire week and leave comments too because everyone likes to hear something nice every now and again. All it takes to be considered for next week's blog as the one that gets stalked is to leave a comment on this post before next Saturday.





In Auckland, New Zealand, Simone writes a lovely blog called Great Fun 4 Kids filled with lots of photos that show glimpses into her wonderful life. Love just oozes from every page and I'm sure you will find the posts totally enjoyable.

The following are a few posts I read while stalking...

• I really think you should start at Simone's About Me because it is as enjoyable as a post, plus you will see a ton of pics while learning about the family!
• Happy, smiling children with gorgeous eyes in Of Beaches, Cider and Cream Teas
• Dash Does London was extra fun because I just finished watching Prince William get married on the television.
• Toy Story Party is definitely fun and I adore the cupcakes.
• Yes, you will be touched and maybe even emotional while reading My Mum And Me .
• I had to add Fancy Nancy Party because it reminded me of all the parties I had for Alyssa and Brittany. These types of memories linger in a mother's mind forever.

Now it is your turn to "stalk" Great Fun 4 Kids and leave comments on the posts highlighted above. Go ahead, make Simone's week one that is filled with comments!

***As a reminder...Be sure to leave a comment on this post if you want to be eligible for stalking next week!







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What To Do When Family Members Hurt You

The people we collectively call "family" can, at times, have us teetering on the edge of sanity. Sometimes they push all our buttons and sometimes, all at the same time.

The Problem: Family Members That Offend You

As you know I have a very active community and sometimes the questions posted are extremely thought provoking.

Elizabeth posted the following question and gave us all a little history...

"Okay, so I don't usually get irritated, I don't get stressed out very much, and I hate confrontation. But my mother in law is staying with us for 3 weeks, my husband is on a 2 week break, my brother in law and father in law are also staying with us for 1-2 weeks each. I live in 1010 square feet. I know fridges get really full with extra people around, as well as the dishes getting used way more than normal, but what am I supposed to do when my mother in law moves all my food in my organized food cabinets (she moved it to what she likes), she moved all my dishes in my cabinets (to what she likes, even though everything had a place that you could easily tell where it went).

I'm going nuts. How do I nicely address this issue? Is this normal of family doing stuff like this when they come to visit?"

My Experience With A Mother-In-Law

When I gave birth to my daughter, my mother-in-law and father-in-law decided to visit us for the big event. I can't remember exactly what day they arrived after Alyssa was born, but I vaguely remember their visit. There were, however, a few moments that stand out greater than the rest.

To be brief, I will say that my body was not made for growing and birthing children which is why I feel quite thankful for my daughter. So after I returned home from the hospital, I stayed in the bed and didn't walk for a week. Actually, I crawled for about three weeks which is something I really try to forget.

So while incapacitated and asleep, my mother-in-law also decided to completely rearrange my kitchen. Alyssa's father came into the room and said, "My mom is rearranging all the stuff in the cabinets because she wants to be helpful." Then he bounced back out of the room. Men are oblivious to the "territorial homemaking rights" that women feel.

Actually, I think men are oblivious to just about everything women feel, but that is another post. (snicker, snicker)

At that point, I didn't care if she pulled all the cabinets off the wall and hammered them on the roof. I was happy enough lying in bed and staring at my child as she slept. I was mesmerized and often in total disbelief that I finally had a baby of my very own.

After a very short visit, my in-laws left and eventually I was able to function in my kitchen again. As I opened each cabinet, the items within screamed "I am so disorganized and I don't make sense being here."

Well, I didn't really feel like redoing my whole kitchen, so for a long time, the items hidden behind the cabinet doors remained the way my mother-in-law had arranged them. Eventually, I put most everything back except for a few things that did actually make more sense being where she had placed them.

My mother-in-law and father-in-law never visited us again. It was their one and only visit to our home. They would fly from one side of the country to the other visiting all their children, cousins and even some vacation sites, but never found the "time" to visit us except for that one time.

Needless to say, I was immensely hurt. I was married to their oldest son and Alyssa was our only child, but we didn't rank high enough for visiting. Obviously, I never really got over it even though I am now divorced and no one in the family has anything to do with me.

My Advice: What To Do When Your Mother-In-Law Rearranges The Kitchen

If you had asked me the question, "What do I do? My mother-in-law completely rearranged the kitchen!" just eight years ago, I would have given you a completely different answer. However, time has healed most wounds, life has gotten shorter and possessions don't mean as much to me any more.

You are married and totally capable of running your own home. Your mother-in-law is your husband's mother which means he has a whole bunch of history with this woman. So I would suggest that you tell your husband how you feel about his mother undoing your kitchen and have him talk to his mother about her behavior and motives.

I suggest this for several reasons:

• Your mother-in-law is your husband's mother and therefore, he speaks her language better. She was the one who taught him to speak!
• Your mother-in-law loves her son totally different than you simply because he is her son.
• Your mother-in-law will not be offended by her son the way she will feel offended by anything you say that sounds critical of her or her behavior.
• It is your husband's responsibility to stand up for you even if it is against the wishes of his mother.
• You have better things to do than be stressed by your mother-in-law or her behavior.
  

After he talks to her and while she is still in your home, ask her if she would help you put everything back the way it was or assist you in starting completely over with the organizing because "two heads are better than one" and you would enjoy her company.

I heard you gasp in horror.

Look at it like this...

If your house burned down tonight, would the arrangement of all the items in the cabinet be worth arguing over?

I don't think so.

There is another lesson to learn:

Don't do this to your daughter-in-law or son-in-law some day.

What To Do When Family Members Hurt And Offend You

Everyone has a different personality, so inevitably there will be conflict. It is impossible to agree on everything and no one really wants that anyway. The world would be an awfully boring place if we were all the same in every way.

When family members offend you, the pain is much greater than when anyone else crosses you or breaks your heart. This circle of trusted people "know" you and have been incorporated in your life longer than anyone else. They are the people that you love unconditionally and you would die for them without blinking an eye. The love you feel is truly indescribable and etched within every atom of your body.

That is a priceless relationship and truly what makes life worth living.

When a family member offends you, 98% of the time it is unintentional. So with that in mind, rethink your actions/reactions to the situation long and hard. Are you without flaw? Do you ever make a mistake? Are you perfect in all your dealings with other people?

Get my point?

I think it was best said by Jesus Christ:

"Let him who is without sin
cast the first stone."

Regardless of whether you believe in Jesus or not, the meaning of the quote is the same. If you are perfect, then go ahead and judge other people harshly with an unforgiving heart. I mean, you're perfect, so you have the right to do so. However, if you are not perfect, it's a totally different story.

A few things to help overcome the hurt and/or anger:

• Don't dwell on the "act" that hurt you. I know---easier said than done.
• Don't try to get even or seek vengeance. Inevitably, you will be seen as more of a "bad guy" than the "bad guy" in the situation.
• Talk with the person that offended you when you are ready and explain how badly their words or actions have hurt and/or angered you.
• Don't let yourself be bullied by friends or the rest of the family to "just forget it" because only people with a brain disorder or disease like Alzheimer's forget events that easily. You need to work through it in order for the pain to go away. Stuffing it inside yourself is not healthy.
• Recognize the value of the other person including their differences. Remember, they are human and members of your family. They love you. Maybe they don't love you like you love them or in the same capacity, but they still love you with all that they can at this moment.
• Meditate. Meditate. Meditate. That means you need to turn off the radio and television. Try driving in the car with the radio off. It helps. I do it every day.
• Seek peace through relaxing experiences.
• Pray for guidance, peace, comfort and the ability to forgive.
• Make a conscious effort to put the whole situation behind you.
• Time heals. It may take a whole lot of time, but the farther you get from the circumstance that happened, the easier it will be not to feel so much pain around it.
  

Unless you live on an island all alone, you are going to have your feelings hurt or become angry at someone. More than likely, the person that causes you pain will be someone in your family because you have more interactions and/or history with them than anyone else on the planet. Healthy familial relationships are worth the effort to cultivate and maintain.

All-in-all, remember possessions and things don't really matter in the whole scheme of life. House, car, couch, dishes, jewelry, carpet or a million other things will all rot or break, but the love of a family can become like super glue and stick you all together forever.

Now that is my opinion. What would you do if your mother-in-law rearranged your kitchen without your permission?

Speak up because we are all ears!

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Massaged Potatoes For Dinner

I don't know how and it pains me to admit it, but I failed at teaching my daughter a very important duty of a daughter.

(Slowly shaking my head side-to-side)

By the time I became a teenager, I was professional at giving a great massage. Each evening after the family ate dinner and washed the dishes, it was movie time. Cable TV, VCRs and DVRs had not been invented yet, so we just turned on the television and hoped for a good movie.

Mom worked hard and I appreciated her efforts to take care of me, so I doted on her. While we watched television, I massaged her neck, shoulders, back and feet. Not to brag, but I developed quite a knack for giving a good massage.

This is where I confess my failure...

My daughter rarely IF EVER massages me and she isn't that great at it. Sorry Alyssa. (smile) I am so deprived! All the thousands of hours that I have massaged will never be reciprocated! *sigh*

So I present to you my recipe for...



Massaged Potatoes


Start with 8 baking potatoes.





Wash the potatoes well under running water.
You definitely don't want gritty dirt in your final dish.





They will be cooked on the top part of a grilling pan.
It's the pan that has the long slitted holes.





You have to poke holes in the potato, so if you are feeling stressed,
just stab them about 1/2 an inch into the potato.
Ahhh, such a nice stress reliever.
It's okay to stab potatoes, I promise.
Whether you poke holes or stab holes,
you need to do it about 30 times.
I told you it was good stress reliever.





Put about 1/2-1 cup of Extra Virgin Olive Oil in a bowl
that is wide enough to accommodate the potato in the next step.





Roll the potato around in the Extra Virgin Olive Oil
and then.......
Massage the potatoes.
Take your time working the oil into the skin and
invisible stabbed holes.
The more you massage, the better the potato will taste.





Place the massaged potato on the foil covered grill pan top.





Evenly space all the potatoes.





If you did a good job at massaging,
your potatoes will be happy
and you will know it.






Sprinkle all sides of the potatoes with salt.
If you aren't allowed to have salt or don't like it,
skip this step.
I can have salt and I love it,
so I use a lot of it.





Cook the potatoes in a 350 degree oven for 1-1/2-2 hours.
The bigger the potato, the longer you have to cook it.
To tell if the potato has been cooked long enough,
you should be able to EASILY push a knife all the way through it.
The salt will turn all white on the crispy skin.
I use enough salt that I don't have
to salt my potato on the inside before I eat it.





Split the potato open in half, long ways.
Add a nice pat of butter and watch it melt.





You'll have a light and flaky potato oozing with melted butter.





The potato will be piping hot and a wonderful way to get that occasional carb.





Here, go ahead.
Take a bite.
Mmmm...good isn't it?




Massaged Potatoes

Ingredients

8 potatoes
1/2-1 cup Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Salt (optional)
Butter and toppings (optional)


Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Wash potatoes well and then pat dry. Poke about 30, 1/2 inch deep holes into the potato.

Coat eat potato with oil and then massage the oil into the potato and invisible holes. Put them on a foiled lined baking grill top equal distance apart.

Bake on center rack in center of the oven for 1-1/2 to 2 hours until knife can easily be inserted all the way through potato. The skin will be crispy and the potato will be soft and flaky.

Serve hot with melted butter or add your favorite toppings.


This is definitely a keeper!

It is such an easy recipe, isn't it?

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Just On The Other Side Of The Gate

How does that side of the gate look to you?

Driving back from Williamsburg on my monthly jaunt to get my hair cut, I decided to take the "back roads" home. Actually, it is a very beautiful scenic route and I often soak up peace while on the drive.

I need peace.

Calmness that I can absorb through meditation, prayer and nature.

About halfway home, I saw a dirt road on the right. There wasn't a soul in sight, so I slowed to a crawl and then swiftly turned into the lane. There was a beautiful red barn on the right and a field of bright green. I'm sure my mother can tell me what the crop was without even seeing the a picture of it.

Anyway, up ahead a little way and on the right I could see two fence posts. I didn't see the gate, so I figured that meant it was probably open. I eventually pulled in front of the opening and just gasped. Out here in the middle of no where stood the perfect home.

Directly through the rust colored gate and tall fence post of the same color was a deep blue, medium sized pond. In the corner of the pond was a deck-like-pier or a pier-like-deck. All around the pound was bright green grass, bushes and flowers. After walking through the gate, but not quite to the pond, stood a double wood swing facing the house and pond. The house itself was cute and very much a Virginia style home with pink Dogwood trees blooming throughout the lawn and surrounding forest. I could even see the American flag waving behind the house on the left.

I rolled down the window of the car and listened...to nothing.

It was totally silent except for an occasional bird tweeting.

I had obviously been holding my breath in wonderment and just then slowly let it out. My whole body began to relax. I felt as if I had walked up to the gates of Heaven.

Sitting there for a long time just soaking in the feeling of county all around and the perfect little home, thoughts flooded my mind and I remembered what someone told me many years ago.

"You have the perfect life."

At the time, I was the General Manager of a hotel, working 60-80 hours a week, a single mother, stressed to the max and very lonely. I guess I was good at "faking" happiness while at work, so I didn't let on otherwise and the person was none the wiser. It wasn't, however, the perfect life.

The Facade

Somewhere along the way between then and now, I lost the facade of a perfect life. I personally think I look a bit beaten down and my concealer doesn't really conceal the black circles that seem to be a permanent part of my face now. I also complain...to myself...all the time.

I don't think that is doing anything positive to boost my morale.

My life is here in the dirt road and just on the other side of the gate is a good life. The grass is actually greener on the other side of the fence because there isn't any grass at all on this side. I feel as if I'm running out of time to "get it right."

While staring at the beautiful home, I thought of Elizabeth Taylor, Patrick Swayze, Michael Jackson and Princess Diana...their lives are over. If they didn't get it right, it is too late to do it now, but it isn't too late for me nor is it too late for you.

Bad things do happen to good people, but so do good things.

I've had a whole bunch of good things happen to me and my extended family even during the turmoil of the last two years. Some of the good things were actually meshed with the bad things, so it is all mixed up. For instance, my dad was diagnosed with cancer and two months later, he died. However, he only suffered for two months instead of years like so many others who eventually are confined to beds and wither away.

Do you understand what I'm trying to say? Dad's passing could have been so much worse. Granted, dying isn't something we look forward to most of the time, but he suffered bravely and died with dignity.

What kind of message am I projecting?

Am I living with dignity?

I want my gravel road of a life to turn into a house surrounded by green grass, a deep blue pond and beautiful flowers. It is hard work. Anyone who has gone to therapy intent on "getting better" knows that the experience is not a passive appointment with meaningless chatter. In order to heal and/or change, it requires a completely open mind and heart. Unfortunately, that also means a plethora tears, pain and hard choices. On the flip side, I have to be patient with myself since my enemy PTSD seems to follow me everywhere that I go.

How To Change

There are a few basic steps in obtaining a change. If you can do the first one, I truly believe that is half the battle won.

• Admit that you need to change - This has to be the first step. Without recognizing the need to change, you can not fathom what it takes to make the change.
  
• Accept yourself as you are now - You've made mistakes. Big deal. I have made mistakes. My mother has made mistakes. My neighbor has made mistakes. The President has made mistakes. Okay, that was supposed to be funny.
  
• Write down the changes you want to make happen - You learned how to write in kindergarten or first grade, so I know that you have this skill. Write it down or type it down...up...where ever! Just get the thoughts into words and put them down on paper in one way or another. If you don't write it, you are not committed to attaining it.
  
• Dream big and without limitations - Why not? People succeed every day at things they were told couldn't be done. Remember Willard Wigan? Okay then! Don't ever say something is impossible, because Willard is proof that all things are possible.
  

"If you hear a voice within you say
'you cannot paint,'
then by all means paint,
and that voice will be silenced."
~Vincent van Gogh~

• Allow for weakness and mistakes - You are not perfect nor will you ever be perfect, so just accept it.
  
• Seek help whether it be friends for moral support or a psychologist for mental health
• See yourself changed and shove the negative thoughts out with that picture of accomplishment
• Take one step at a time - You can't eat an elephant of a problem in one bite.
  
• Don't stop taking steps - Definitely keep taking steps because that is how you are going to get on the other side of the gate.

"This one step -
choosing a goal and
sticking to it
- changes everything."
~ Scott Reed~

Life is not easy for most people and we are all passing each other in every direction. Don't waste your life pining over all that you do not have and have not done. Do something. Change something. Motivate yourself. Stand tall even if you are short (wink) You can succeed at having your dreams come true and live a life of happiness.

It can and will happen if you want it...really want it.

Are you standing on the dirt road wishing to be just on the other side of the gate?

What are you doing to change your position?








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Vile Language Weeds

After thinking it all the way through, I knew it wasn't a good idea, so I just kept my mouth shut. However, there have been many times, especially in my youth where I said it anyway.

I stepped outside the other day and noticed that the plants in the flower bed were really starting to grow proving that Spring had sprung. They had shot up pretty much in the same neat rows that they were planted, but each year brings about more shoots from each plant. I'm sure that eventually, unless thinned, the entire bed will be covered with green shoots and when fully grown will be a massive bed of leafy plants.

Now, however, they remain nice clumps of multiple green shoots like a family. There are individual members, but each have their own unique qualities. If they do things together, they will grow together toward the same end goal.

It takes a lot of sunshine, water and nutrients to keep the plants green and to enable them to grow thick and healthy. The same can be said about people. The fresh air, good food, clean water and vitamins enable our bodies and minds to grow or to remain healthy.

These plants, due to their close proximity to each other, experience everything together whether it be rain, clouds, hail, tornadoes, sunshine, snow, flood or drought. Families are individual members being pulled in all directions, but with a little effort and planning, can spend quality time together. Going through experiences together provides a foundation to build upon and later it can provide support during the rough patches.

Working through the good and bad times is important because we learn how to help those we love in a way that is comfortable to them. Happy, supportive families appear beautiful just as do the well tended plants in the garden. Everything runs smoothly when actions are unselfish, words are soft and support is given with love.

It isn't always easy, but in order to have solid relationships, it is totally necessary. Plus, the family is the place where children learn to become great companions and friends.

Each plant counts and each member adds value to the family. Since we are all unique, our differences can enhance our commonalities and bring interest to our every day lives.

However, sometimes the words that come out of our mouths are toxic, harsh and cause us to emanate qualities that are undesirable. The adage that "sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me," is simply not true.

Words can pierce the very depths of our soul with searing pain.

The ugliness changes our appearance and begins to grow like a weed. If we do not rid ourselves of the undesirable trait, the weed of ugliness will take over. I don't know why, but ugliness always grows twice as fast as love and kindness. Before you know it, weeds of despair, discontent and depression rule life's flower bed.

Eventually, the whole family is engulfed in unhappiness and vile language which is evident even in their appearance in the community.

Teachers hold conferences with parents about the children's misbehaviors or inability to learn at the same rate as the rest of the class.

The parent(s) employment can be compromised because of the volatile feelings that flow over to co-workers.

It seems hopeless and the seeds of disharmony can spread to other families in the community.

With recognition of the problem, a steadfast effort to pluck the offending behaviors from their every day actions, the family can survive and also thrive.

Is this easy?

No.

Once plucked, will selfish, ugliness in actions or speech ever return to either one individual or the collective family?

Maybe, yes.

The important thing to remember is that together, as a family, there can be success if the individual members are committed.

So the next time you want to say the horrible cutting remark or lash out in anger with vicious and vile language, remember the weed. The green weed that sucks the nutrients from the plant. The big weed that blocks the suns rays from getting to the plant. The ugly green weed that destroys the plant and eventually kills it.

The death of a plant isn't a pretty sight, but neither is the dissolution of a family unit that was once filled with happiness and love.

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Bathing Wastes Water

We've all learned that being good stewards of the planet includes not wasting our water supply. It is just common knowledge. So if you know me, tie yourself to the chair or better yet, just lay down (Is that "lay" or "lie" because I can't ever remember which to use?) on the couch with the laptop while you read because I don't want you to hit your head as you fall out from shock. It's going to get stinky.

My grandmother, lovingly referred to as Mam-Maw, needed everything to be clean and she handed down,depending on your point of view, that flaw, passion, obsession or fantastic characteristic to the members of her family. She spent almost every spare minute performing some act of cleaning. The rest of her waking hours were spent in being of service to my grandfather, Gran-Gran.

When I visited every weekend, she put me to work dusting a billion knick-knacks and I do not exaggerate a bit. I also re-folded the dishtowels that filled a huge drawer in the kitchen, cleaned the glass on the doors, swept the porches and fetched her a million things to help throughout the day.

By the time night rolled around, it was time to bathe. Of course, Mam-Maw had already made me wash my hands a ton of times, so I didn't think I was all that dirty. I loved sitting in the bathtub and so I willingly bathed thinking that I would then be clean.

But, no, no, no. I was wrong.

After sitting in the bathe tub so long that my fingers and toes were as wrinkled as a thousand year old woman, I slipped into my flannel pajamas and slippers while proclaiming myself to be, "All clean!" I would later learn that one is never truly all clean because there is at least one more thing that can be cleaned.

That has been the routine passed down from generation to generation. One of the greatest joys in life is taking a shower that lasts so long, all the hot water is drained from the hot water heater. That takes about twenty to thirty minutes, so I really enjoy the relaxation of water beating down on my usually tired, achy muscles.

Let's jump back a week...

Alyssa turned eighteen years old. I've known this was going to happen for quite a while. Okay, so I've been expecting that day for eighteen years and nine months, but who is counting?

As excited as she was to hit the milestone, I was excited and saddened equally. It is a beautiful miracle looking at your own child who has turned into a beautiful woman while knowing that you had a huge part in molding her life. Believe me when I say, I've spent more time with my child than the average parent which is why I was also very sad too at her age accomplishment. My little girl has grown up and no longer needs me to brush her teeth, pick out her clothes, cut her food, and a billion other things that I found to be totally fulfilling.

Yes, this post is still discussing bathing...just hang on and keep your twitchy finger off the mouse clicker.

Uh, huh. I do have a spy camera set up in your house, so I can see you.

Anyway, last week the transmission in my car went to car-parts-Heaven. I can't really complain because I've known it was "going" for two years, but just because I drive a twelve year old car, doesn't mean that I'm ready to get a new vehicle yet. The song from "My Fair Lady" says it best:

I've grown accustomed to his face,
He almost makes the day begin,
I've grown accustomed to the tune he whistles night and noon.
His smiles, his frowns,
His ups his downs are second nature to me know
Like breathing out and breathing in.

I was so really independent and content before we met,
Surely i could always be that way again and yet
I've grown accustomed to his looks...

Yeah, I have a love affair with my car. I'm going to have to save for awhile before I can renew that relationship.

I also had a two hour session with my therapist. Ah, yes, the therapist. I have to see him all the time because as much as I would like to "pray it away," or "drug it away," I must cope with my PTSD to make it go away.

Cope.

*sigh* I'm trying.

Adding to the list is the pressure to complete my new blog redesign. So in the midst of all the messes in my life, I have been learning more coding techniques and trying to be creative.

That's where the bathing comes in...

I had Friday off from work, so I didn't set my alarm the night before which caused me to sleep until noon. It was a very weird feeling to wake up so late, but a weirdness I enjoyed.

Anyway, I jumped up and started looking at my new blog design with a fresh eye. I coded, researched, read, looked at it all critically, then coded some more.

Breakfast was combined with a quick lunch and I didn't cook dinner.

I was really in a groove by the time 10:00 p.m. rolled around.

No, I had no intention of quitting to go to bed yet!

Everyone else went to bed.

The phone stopped ringing.

Silence permeated my home except for the clicking of the computer keyboard and mouse.

I started to feel a little tired, but I just rubbed my eyes and persevered. I was rather surprised when a voice said, "You are still up?! It's morning!"

That's when I turned to look out the window which proved a new bright and sunny day had arrived. I had not moved from my chair since 10:00 p.m. the night before and it was now 6:30 a.m. Saturday.

So I did what any normal person would do...I ate breakfast which revived me with more energy to continue my coding research and implementation. I took a two hour nap and upon waking, my subconscious had helped me decide on some answers to a few questions that were running through my mind.

I ran to the computer and started typing. Before I knew it, the clock in the corner of my computer monitor read 1:35 a.m. Sunday morning. It was Easter.

THAT'S when it hit me.

I had barely moved from my chair and had missed baths on:

• Friday morning (groggily walked to my computer)
• Friday night (is just a blur of typing)
• Saturday morning (can't believe it arrived so quickly)
• Saturday night (well, 1:35 a.m. Sunday is still Saturday night, right?)

I apparently am not as obsessed with cleanliness as Mam-Maw or at least not as much as I am at working on the internet. To put everyone's mind at ease, I did finally bathe and drained the hot water heater. I used all the water I saved from not bathing at one fell swoop (Macbeth, 1605 - Didn't know I was so well versed?). Obviously, bathing may be a waste of water for some people, but I'm not giving up my great showers. I'm sure my family and friends are glad of that fact too.

Now we have come full circle and it is still bothering me about whether you should "just lay down" or "lie down" on the couch. I better go look up the grammar or it will bother me all night.

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Not Head First

When Alyssa proclaimed, "I want a puppy," I knew that I was doomed. I've always had a very hard time telling my daughter "No" if it wasn't something that wasn't harmful.

It didn't take long before she saved the money herself and found a dog she wanted to purchase. After taking a two hour drive one Saturday, we arrived at the breeder's place. When we left, Bella was with us.

Everything in our home immediately became a toy to the puppy. My slippers first lost the bow and then seemed to become her constant companion.

Unfortunately, she was very inquisitive and chewed on things that she wasn't supposed to like Alyssa's laptop and everything else she could confiscate.

I couldn't help myself and although I tried hard not to care for Bella, the puppy, I fell in love with her.

In November 2010, Bella chewed and swallowed Alyssa's bra strap with the metal clips still on both ends. Because she is just a Toy Poodle and quite small, the clip on one end passed through her stomach. However, the other clip remained in her stomach causing her entire digestive tract to begin knotting up and killing her. After emergency surgery, lots of money, many prayers and a long recuperation, Bella lived.

With that horrible experience behind us, we are very vigilant in keeping everything up and away from the reach of her might teeth.

Bella is quite smart and very loving. She spends a lot time sleeping in my lap while I blog and bringing me a great amount of peace.

We have our own little routines, Bella and I, but she is still full of surprises. When I go into my bathroom, she always jumps up and sits on the toilet lid to keep me company. Of course, I talk to her all the time, so she is attentively listening to every syllable. I'm sure she understands each word I say. (wink)

Anyway, I had a tissue in my hand and so I walked into the bathroom with the intention of throwing it into the toilet instead of the trash. Why make more trash, you know? Bella was hot on my heels as usual. Upon entering the bathroom, I reached down and lifted the toilet lid at exactly the same moment that Bella leaped to get on top of the very same toilet lid.

Instead of landing on the lid, Bella dived head first into the toilet, bonking her head against the inside back. It kind of dazed her for a second, but I was pulling her out before she even realized what was happening. Needless to say, it scared me terribly!

After a few seconds, she was intent on running all over the place like a wild jungle animal, so I knew she was still fine.

It only reaffirms my belief that all redheads, be it human or animal, must have the same klutzy gene and we often dive head first into things. I guess I should be proud...at least I haven't dazed myself by hitting my head on the inside of the toilet...Well, not yet.

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How To Create A Comment Link In Blogger

You're surfing the internet.

Ahhh....a blog.

An interesting blog catches your attention, so you start reading a post.

Wow! The writing made you think, gave you a good feeling or maybe just totally wasn't your point of view at all. The next thing you want to do is post your opinions in the comment section.

Where is that comment section?

Hmmm...

You found the "comment" link and it says, "All Idiots Post Your Opinion Here."

Yes, my friends, that is a true story and I promise you that I did not write a comment on that blog for two reasons. The most important one is that I'm not an idiot and the second is that I knew no matter what I said, it wouldn't be valued at all. So I didn't waste my breath...well...I didn't waste my energy typing.

How To Create The "Comment" Link in Blogger

What you call the "comment" link and where it is located in a post is determined by you.

Follow these simple steps to create the "comment" link in your Blogger template for your Blogger blog.

• Click the DESIGN tab

• Click the PAGE ELEMENTS tab
  

• Now you see the different elements of your blog. At the bottom of the BLOG POST element, click EDIT
  

A pop-up screen will appear giving you several options from which to choose.

• Put a check mark next to the COMMENT option.

• Choose the wording that you want to appear as the "comment" link. I've seen everything from "Comments," "Shout it Out," "Kind Remarks," and mine says "People 'rote' comments". This is the link your readers will click if they want to make a comment about your post.
  

• Drop down to ARRANGE ITEMS and decide where you want the "comments" link to appear. It can be placed below the post title which is above the post or below the post.
  

• To move the "comment" link, hover over the comment option box, left click, keep holding down the left click button, and then drag the "comment" box to the position you want it to appear.
  

• After the "comment" is working and in the position that you desire, click SAVE.
  

• You will then be back on the screen that shows all your blog elements. Click SAVE.
  

• Now go to your blog and look at your "comment" link. It should be in the position and be worded the way that you changed it.
  

I value the comments that my readers leave especially because they often give wise advice or share personal experience/stories that relate to my post. It can't get better than that in my opinion.






This is the weekly post where I spotlight my Rockin' Friends who are the Top Nine active participants and loyal followers in my community! If you want to be mentioned here next week, then all it takes is to come in and start chatting with everyone in my community.

This week it was a outright crazy competition to see who could post the most and be the #1 Rockin' Friend in The Redhead Riter's, Witty, Intelligent and Addictive Community. When we had an online welcome party for my sister, who finally joined the community, the comments and chatting were at phenomenal proportions! Unlike last week, I did not mow anyone down. Instead, we were all mowed down by our top commenter. We were goofy, but did have a great time this week chatting with each other.

With a big, humongous thank you for their participation and friendship, here are the Rockin' Friends this week in order of most participation. I am also posting the number of comments they made, so that you can see how dedicated and devoted they are to each other and the community...Oh, PS - Notice that there's a man in house!!!

• Joan at A Bad Marriage Is Fattening


• Bev at eBlebco


• Aleta at Paws For Thought


• Richard at Divorce Lawyer in Augusta, Georgia


• Audrey at Tinsel Teeth Chronicles


• Lori at Lori's LOLz


• PJ at PJ's Prayer Line


• Carol at ArtMuseDog


• Arlene at Flour On My Face

I'm so glad that I've been able to become friends with these lovely ladies who are so active in my community. I encourage you to add their blogs to your blogroll, but also come over and chat with us in my community.

For everyone mentioned in the top nine this week, feel free to grab the Rockin' Friend badge below (Yeah, we do crazy poses like that too because we are stylish LOL) and thank you for your participation!!





<a href="http://www.theredheadriter.com" target="_blank"><img style="width: 150px; height: 150px;" border="0" alt="Rockin' Friends" title="Rockin' Friends" src="http://i622.photobucket.com/albums/tt308/TheRedHeadRiter/2009%20TEMPLATE/69015f9c.jpg" /></a>

Until the spotlight next week...Happy Chatting Rockin' Friends!

Until next week...Kiss your family, hug your friends and don't forget to be the friend you would like to have around.

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